Tales: Written and Lost
by FeZeTh13
Summary: Varric did not record everything in Hawke's life. These are the random stories of her life in Kirkwall- some Varric recorded in his book and others that just stayed in Hawke's journal and memories. F!Hawke/Fenris.


**Hello I am FeZeTh13 and am really new at fanfiction. This has been in my head since I first played the game. I will be posting random chapters from various points in the game, eventually putting them in order to the actual story. Until then, these are the random stories my overactive imagination comes up with. **

**A Bloodied Key**

(Set in Act 3 after defeat of Danarius)

Marian Hawke sits at Fenris' feet, between his knees, and back against his legs. Tracing the markings on his hand, they are talking and laughing about Varric's latest book.

"Have you read any of his manuscript on my story?" Hawke asks changing the topic. Fenris leans in and wraps an arm around her, placing his chin on her shoulder.

"I have not read any of your story, Hawke. I have been living it alongside you these six years." He whispers in her ear. His voice vibrates alongside her neck and she feels it down to her toes. She laughs a little bit at his answer.

"Yes you have." She kisses his cheek and he chuckles moving to rest his cheek against the top of her head. "He is incredibly right on time with events. You should read it. He has just finished writing your chapters, about your fight with Danarius." She feels him tense up and sit up, pulling his body from hers. She can almost feel the sadness coming off of him. "Fenris, what's wrong?"

"It is… nothing. I am sorry. Please continue." She grabs his hand before he can pull that away too.

"Fenris. Please talk to me. Don't bury it inside where it will only become sharper and cut you deeper." She strokes his hand in what she hopes he finds reassuring. She is relieved when his thumb starts moving against her palm.

"I-." He cuts off trying to find the right words to say, still getting used to putting deeper feelings into words. "I don't feel at peace with my past. I fought for these markings and to what end? For a sister who would betray me, and a mother who did not live long in her freedom. Did they even have a happy life? From what Varania said, they did not." He spat out her name and then continued, "I still wish I had not let her live, for any hope of happiness I might find in my past was shattered with the words she spoke while running away." Fenris answered, sounding sad, angry, confused, and lost.

"Oh love, that is not what I saw." She could feel Fenris tighten like a coil in confusion and she hoped it wasn't also anger. "Varania's words were a poison. But they were also a key. A terrible one, but I think it opened some doors to your past; and not just the ones about your markings. Though I hope from now on your memories will be opened from happiness, not hurt." She took a deep breath and kept playing with his hand to try to comfort him and let him see that she meant no harm in her words, and that she was not truly disagreeing with him about Varania. His thumb remained still and his body was still really tense, which saddened her. But she would finish, if he let her.

"I thought of your mother. She named you Leto, and names carry great weight. Leto means 'he who is always happy', correct? Well I believe your mother named you as such, so she could give you a blessing . That even though you lived in that terrible land, she wanted you to be happy, with her and in your future. I think it is a look into how much she loved you. Also, that you would sacrifice your freedom shows how much you loved her. She must have taken good care of you and loved you so, to have you love her so much." Hawke sighed in relief when his hand moved to thread their fingers together and he relaxed a little around her.

"I believe that when you heard that there was an opportunity to have any boon granted, you didn't even hesitate to train in earnest. Your mother was probably terrified at the prospect of her baby boy going against such odds and giving his freedom for hers. Probably felt terrified, sad, happy, and oh so loved by her son. On the day that you won, she was probably just happy you were alive, yet sad that you had given up freedom. . A young man full of passion and pride. You are still a man full of passion and pride. Her life may have ended early, but I can't imagine a parent feeling more loved by her child, and I am sure you were on her mind all the time. Wondering if you were as happy as the namesake and blessing she gave you." Hawke felt something wet fall onto her shoulder and she quickly turned around to face Fenris. His hair blocked his eyes, but she saw the silent tear resting on his chin.

"This is one thing I know for sure; she smiles upon you from the Makers side. So proud of who you are." She says cupping his face as his shoulders jerk forward and he chokes. Hawke suddenly feels really guilty. "Fenris, I'm sorry."

"No." His voice is raw as he speaks and he looks up at her. His eyes are shining with tears as one rolls down his face. He brings his hand up to hold onto hers, still on his face. "No, you made something bitter, into something beautiful. I like to think that what you say is true and my mother was as you say." He smiles a little. "If it is true, then my mother's wish came true. I have found my happiness. My happiness is you Marian." He says and Marian smiles too with tears on her face as he leans in kissing her, beginning to feel peace about his past for the first time.


End file.
